We’re back! Well, I’m back. Like most Anaglyph “employees”, I’m still in high school, and started classes last Monday. So there has been precious little time to compose this column, although that’s no excuse. A friend of my dad’s, Paul Mather, once said, “… writing a column can be like working at a sausage factory—use filler if you have to, just for God’s sake keep cranking that grinder. The upside is that sometimes the sausage comes tasting pretty good, even if you’ve run out of pork and had to use horse lips.” Paul is a very strange man. He’s writing a sitcom now.
I’ve mentioned the particle effects before, but now the guys in the programming pit have put the code into action, particularly on the aforementioned tank level. The screenshots can be seen in the Schism gallery, if you hadn’t seen them already. The Schism section of the site has received a definite boost, although a lot of the content is still missing. That should be rectified shortly. … Wait, am I supposed to do that?
Boss-Man Algernon has also bum-rushed us staff with a wave of projects, in the desparate hope that it will increase our productivity. It appears to be working, at least a little bit, although mostly we’ve been pestering Alg about his constant misspelling of the main character’s name. Lyger went on about it quite a bit in ALL CAPS YELLING, and Th3w even went so far as to put the correction in his sig. In other words, we’re a bunch of stupid teenagers. But you already knew that.
Speaking of stupid teenagers, the Ego-Stroking Page is back! Although there are no staff bios, and Alg appears to have been drunk when he wrote the content for the page. Still, it’s promising. Some day, we might even get paid.
Some of you may recall something about a storm hitting the Boss-Man’s house. He lost internet not because of electrical storms, but because the nearest Comcast tower was knocked over. Cool, but not nearly as dramatic. If any of you had the image of Alg clinging to a light fixture, screaming, “AUNTIE EM! AUNTIE EM! IT’S A TWISTEEEERRR!”, you weren’t far off.
That’s about it for this week. Alg’s promise that there would be two columns today has just been made a lie. See you next week, provided I don’t drop dead from the workload, and remember to check out the Anaglyph Store.